Never Make Friends with Teachers on Facebook

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/05/magazine/05FOB-ethicist-t.html?_r=1

First of all, the kids who friended their teacher, but didn't place restrictions on what he or she could view from their profile are stupid! One of the biggest differences between Facebook and Myspace (and the reason I deleted my Myspace) is because Facebook has the option to make private whatever you don't want certain people to see. It is even possible to customize what individual people see. I have older cousins with Facebook accounts. When I say "older," I mean A LOT older, as in "married, with kids, working full time." Besides the fact that they're all much older than I am, they are all super devout Mormons who take transgressions seriously. I don't want them to go blabbing to my parents that I'm drinking underage, that I have been going to raves or that I swear like whoa when I'm upset. The way I view it, everyone has secrets. Being friends on Facebook is a recognition that that person exists, not an automatic go-ahead for them to know everything about you. Simply, if I don't want someone to see my pictures, I don't let them. If I don't want certain people to know who is sending me bumper stickers, I hide that part of my profile. If I don't want someone to contact me, I block their asses! Or, borrowing from the saying, "abstinence is the best protection," withholding private information is probably the best way to go.

To begin with, though, friending teachers is just plain weird! Just as most people probably don't want their teachers to see the drunken orgies they participated in, most people probably don't want to see the drunken orgies their teachers participated in. Why would you put a teacher through the agony of having to know that you, their student, is smoking pot or, from the looks of this picture, doing something naked in that hotel room bed? As a rule, I never friend my coaches, teachers or family members, and if I were to, I would definitely not let them see everything I'm doing, no matter how close I am to them.

As for the whole, "intervening if they kid is in trouble" situation, dude, Facebook is, "a place for friends." FRIENDS, not psychologists and therapists and people who want to set out remedying other peoples' lives. If a teacher is going to be friends with a student and vice versa, seeing someone's business is none of each others' concern. If someone is cutting themselves and posting pictures/videos of them doing the deed, yes, by all means, notify someone. Drinking or smoking or having sex are not things I would consider "life threatening," at least not in the immediate future. Notifying someone else about someone doing anything "minor" may just cause undue embarassment.

And to comment on "the old racist lady" article, that's messed up. If I noticed something like that, I would be sure to bump that person on the way out.